31415926535

joined 1 year ago
 

Been homeless over 6 years. My social services agency, high turnover. Being female , almost all my case managers have been female, standard practice.

Out of 17 case managers, only 2 have been male. Female cms: detailed, logical, responsive, solution oriented, clear effective communication. Male cms, the opposite.

I try to communicate clearly, effectively, which is easy cuz autism, and the 2 male cms, i get constant 2nd guessing, passive-aggressive defensiveness. Get impression they're automatically assuming I don't think clearly, don't know what I'm saying. It's weird, and I can't figure out why.

I know not all men are the same. I'm not like all women. Have I just been unlucky with these 2 cms, or is there a gender aspect to this I'm not understanding? I'd like to learn.

 

Rewatching ds9 right now. I know it was rushed, forced. I know trying to replace a long-term character doesn't work often. If it was an entirely different trill, not a dax, it would be better.

My problem is: aren't trills supposed to have other lives when they get a symbiont? Goal is to give the symbiont diverse lives, experiences. Jadzia got in serious trouble when she felt drawn to a woman from a previous host relationship. She would have had her symbiont removed.

So the new dax host being a woman, starfleet, in ds9 space station? Isn't that against trill rules?

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 1 points 6 months ago

Can't answer question directly. Just, when I was your age, there was so much I needed to learn. Every person takes time to figure things out, overcome shortcomings, work thru stuff.

At 21, lot to figure out, discover, learn. For me, cuz childhood abuse, trauma, autism, I was a mess. No idea how to have healthy relationships, positive communication, etc.

So, could be your dude is just young, figuring stuff out. Or could be something else. Only way to know is to ask, talk about it. No assumptions, no judgment. Communication is key.

Might be useful to research how to communicate effectively. How to talk about stuff in not about criticize, instead seeing other person's viewpoint, meeting half way. Problem is, other person may not want to or be able to.

You're doing good, asking questions. Keep doing that, and good luck.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee -1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)

I don't do well in traditional semester college cuz adhd.

So, never went to college. Started in fast food, last job was 75k/ year tech job.

I took a lot of short term accredited programs. ROP certifications. LearnIT. Studied on my own to test MVP certifications for excel, PowerPoint, word. You can study on your own to take A+ certification exam. I took community college non credit classes about various applied arts.

So, I'd show up at job interviews with no traditional college degree, but a ton of certifications, short term classes, etc. They were fascinated by my diverse tech skills, it showed I had ambition. So I got a lot of jobs easily this way.

Also, try being a career temp for a while. If you prove you'll show up for the gigs professionally, they'll send you to more assignments . I did this for a decade, got phenomenal skillset, different industries , lot of diverse experience.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Goodwill stores, at least where i live, are good for people in shaky situations. More accepting of people with special needs, circumstances. Mention cuz, not the type of work you're looking for... for me, been out of work so long (8 years), me getting a p/t job at goodwill, committing, proving i can keep it, it's the only way better paying jobs will take me seriously.

Would like the 75k per year tech job I had b4 becoming homeless. But have to be realistic, start small.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Borderline schizoaffective, psychotic features. Constantly questioning sanity. Reality often surreal. Dbt, cbt has helped the most. If I practice mindfulness, grounding exercises daily.... when mind spirals, reality starts to explode, easier to come back, keeps me tethered.

Tho, once as kid, when I became convinced I might be a disembodied brain floating in a jar, started to seriously freak out. Came home in terrorized panic, flipping madly thru my bookshelf, and reading "summa theologica" finally made the panic stop.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Sometimes, when I've researched something and compiled a ton of useful information about a topic... wish there was a lemmy for that. Kind of the opposite of asklemmy.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 49 points 6 months ago (7 children)

I tried to open a bank account at a credit union while homeless. Had $42k on my direct express card, finally on SSI, lump sum was for the previous year while unable to work.

No debts, never used a credit card. Couldn't open a bank account. Had to go thru a program that assigned me a fake credit card debt that I had to pay off for 6 months to get my credit score high enough.

Credit scores are a scam.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 5 points 6 months ago

I stare at the wall reciting pi over and over, while my body withers, mind untethered, consumed by a mathematical void.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 2 points 6 months ago

Baba Brinkman does rap music about science, evolution.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 2 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Dunno why, but your comment reminded of this:

https://youtu.be/2oRlBmwKzy4?si=NIg2ELZBkRCm_HzO

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 17 points 6 months ago

I like it. Just wish niche communities were more active.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 4 points 6 months ago (8 children)

"Now that's what I call music" I'm embarrassed to say, I use those volumes a lot to keep in touch with younger generations, new music. Also, among the more popular torrents generally, so download fast.

[–] 31415926535@lemm.ee 24 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I used to identify as Libertarianian. Resented taxes, overreaching, infiltrating my life, all about independence, don't want to be interfered with.

Then I became homeless. Realized how the social services, ssi, Medicare are important. Sure there are lazy people, but also those who genuinely need help, who want to get back on their feet. Care a lot more now about wanting to live in a society that actually cares about the people in it.

 

Holy hell, the miniskirts. I know it was progressive for its time, women's lib, etc. But: Female officers bending over console, butt swell hanging out. Almost every episode, over sexualized women needlessly emotional, constantly falling into male arms. Barely clothed, wisps of fabric. Spock saying that Kirk's alter ego trying to rape his female officer made him interesting.

I'm at episode 14, 1st season. Is the rest of the series like this?

That said, there's a hard, pure science to it I haven't seen in later star treks. Can see how people then would find it fascinating. Also gets deep, in a weighty, high drama way.

 

Problem: I'm being driven mad by voices speaking to me thru white noise. Need white noise to sleep

Psychiatrist today suggested:

  1. normal human speech has typical rhythm, cadence
  2. fans, white noise audio files are always looped, rhythms in it
  3. brain is hearing those patterns as human voices
  4. I need to introduce staggered rhythms to disrupt

Possibilities:

  1. Willie Nelson, William Shatner speak with atypical cadence. Play at same time as white noise
  2. phone app that vibrates atypically
  3. machine in room that generates atypical rhythms, vibrations

Options, ideas? I'd like not to go further insane

 

Not looking for pity. But if you are having an awful December holiday, you aren't alone. This may be a chance to unload. I'll start.

My apt was flooded with rain 4 days ago, at ground level. For 4 days, my studio apt, carpet has been soaking wet, footsteps squishing, like stepping in a puddle. Property management wont do anything, hope I can talk sense into them before the floorboards rot and cave in.

You? It's OK, you're not alone.

 

I've never been able to. I've tried:

Keeping receipts, text file on laptop, trying to keep track... too absent minded. Forget one receipt, it's all off.

Bank app on phone? Phone stolen last year, wary.

Weekly visit to atm to check balance? Forget pin, can't remember, locked out of account.

Paying for everything with cash might work, but unsafe neighborhood. And I forget where cash is, random $20 bills found in bizarre locations months later.

At my wit's end. Any adhd people experience similar?

 

I'll start. Apt next door is having a cockroach infected. 4 days ago, I was playing sims on my laptop, wearing my eyeglasses. Right lens got blurry, took off, huge cockroach was crawling across inside of lens. While I was wearing them. Freak out ensued.

 

I know it's gross, unhealthy, a stupid habit, makes no sense.

Trouble quitting cuz it's something to do with hands, fidgety, restless, oral fixation I think, and it gets me out of the house. Can't find a habit to replace it with.

 

For me, its Xena.

Few years back, height of covid epidemic, was living in homeless shelters. Overcrowded slums, everyone miserable, yelling, screaming, fights, abuse, rage. At one point, could feel the anger building in me. Powerless, a victim, desire for retribution. What good was trying to be better person, when all it meant was people walking over me.

Started rewatching xena, hadn't in years. Big message of the show: when surrounded by hate, violence, it's tempting to give in, to not be a victim. But you have a choice, to not continue the cycle, to make a better world. I so needed to hear that message at that time in my life.

What tv show helped you?

 

Living in cruddy apt. Anger management neighbor slamming doors constantly. Bed shakes, waking me up.

Previously, what works is anti vibration layers under bed. Prosourcefit exercise puzzle mats, quietwalk flooring underlayment, felt rug pad with rubber backing, thick cut high pile rug, anti vibration pads.

That normally works. But not with this insane dude. Can I build some sort of platform under bed, on rollers, like how buildings cope with earthquakes?

I'm looking for creative engineering solutions, out of the box ideas.

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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by 31415926535@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
 

I'm trying to learn to buy groceries, cook for myself again.

Can't afford to buy and keep produce. Limited cookware. So, any recipe telling me to crush garlic, dice onions, etc, can't do.

Need budget, ghetto, for people on a fixed income, easy no frills way to make diy tomato paste pasta sauce.

Good suggestions so far. Tks. I have 1 bowl, 1 plate, 1 spoon, 1 fork, 1 butter knife ; 1 small sauce pan; Only stores nearby are corner stores. Hardly any produce. Having to make due with what you can find in a liquor store.

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