Programmer Humor

No, I made it pixel by pixel on a piece of paper, and then scanned it to spread the word.

Yes, it's just buried under crap and and redundant copies of itself. And possibly still written in Fortran.

I think it's only getting worse. I always assumed the next generation will be more tech savvy than the last one. I had to learn windows/mac/dos when i grew up, just to play some video games. There was a lot of troubleshooting and hardware problems i had to figure out. When i was 25, people would tell me that their 5 year old can use their ipd better than they can. (Ipads just came out.) I thought these kids are gonna be computer wizards when they grow up. It was the absolute opposite. I talked to these kids when they were around 16 again, and they were absolutely clueless. If it wasn't an ipad or an app they could use, they might as well play with a piece of glass. Can you do ..... On an ipad? Hmm, what app is that? It's not an app is something you do, like a setting. Hmmm... I'll check the app store.

Vaguely.

Well, they use a for loop that whatever group of bureaucrats has to enter a limit into, but basically yes.

Removing spinlocks on IO by using async event handling can reduce cpu usage

Oh I can use threads and recursion to stop CPU usage.

Maybe if the threads pause a lot, and pause even more as the stack unwinds to the final exciting conclusion.

Twitter is just a wrapper around a database.

I get my Java from a local coffee shop

Rust is even easier, you probably have some you aren't even using. Check in the bikeshed.

Don't understand why it takes people so long anyways, took me like 5 seconds to write it.

and if they want to go fancy and cheap, suggest excel.

Knowing which buttons to push is the valuable part though.

I dont know where I heard this story but it was something like the following:

In a company a very valuable machine breaks and becomes inoperable, so they call the support. They send a mechanic to fix the machine. The mechanic arrives inspects the machine, opens it, presses a button and it works as if nothing happened. The manager then asks why he is paying the mechanic just to press a button. The mechanic answers "you aren't paying me for pressing the button, but for knowing which button to press".

they said optimize CPU usage, not reduce CPU usage. clearly they actually want to increase CPU utilization in this mysterious "0.02%" situation in order to get the results faster

Its a traditional shape you try to recreate in algorithmic 3d graphics

HTTP 418

A standard reference model in 3d modeling.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Utah_teapot