this post was submitted on 11 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] Lenny@lemmy.zip 99 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (3 children)

I remember having to crack the PIN code to access the locked channels (which would just give me access to things like skinemax late at night). I faked sick one day to stay home and set to work. I think there was a short timeout after a few failed attempts, so you could only go so fast. It only took 852 tries but I got it! It was 0852, which was just a straight line up the keypad πŸ˜‘

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 58 points 5 days ago (2 children)

That's way more dedication to a nut then I've ever had

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[–] Holyginz@lemmy.world 28 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Hearing this let's me realize how lucky I was in this regard. I got a PSP when I was young and either my parents didn't know it had an internet browser or they didn't know it was a fully fleshed out browser.

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 11 points 5 days ago

I grew up on AOL, and the day I figured out internet explorer allowed me to access the Internet outside of their locked down kids mode was glorious.

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[–] JaymesRS@literature.cafe 31 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 69 points 5 days ago (2 children)

My dad got these black market cable boxes from one of his less than reputable friends way back when. We got literally everything, including full porn channels that weren't scrambled. They were technically blocked by my parents, but the family pincode was well known.

I used to watch the porn channels and never could figure out why they were so... Meh for me. Turns out, very gay. Lol

Once my parents split up we didn't have those boxes anymore, and I used to watch Cat House and went through the same "why is this so frustratingly close to being good" experience lol

[–] Entropywins@lemmy.world 26 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Quick question...was straight porn like ew gross or just not interesting? I find your porn story really funny and hope I don't offend by saying so.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 24 points 5 days ago (3 children)

No, not gross. Before I knew I was gay it more frustrating than anything. Like, I knew this was sexual, I knew I wanted to enjoy it, and I knew it made me horny. But it wasn't enough to cross than line into, like, getting me there and being enjoyable. It wasn't until I found my brother's porn magazines that I really enjoyed porn, and that was because of the guys in it, and a few erotic stories in them written from women's POV. I still didn't realize I was gay or that it was the guys getting me there until one day, when I was like 13/14 and I had a blackberry. I found a site that had nude pictures of celebrities (some blog, not like a dedicated site), and there were (I'm assuming fake) nudes or Kirk Cameron on a boat. OMG, I got off so hard, and then went into full panic when I realized what that meant. Spent the next few years trying to figure out how to undo it. Lol.

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[–] ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 9 points 5 days ago

I do believe it was a 4001 Diode soldered between pins 5 and 7; got everything but HBO...

Used to have all my friends over for the WWF pay-per-views.

[–] GBU_28@lemm.ee 28 points 5 days ago (1 children)

You fool, mother could also just hit "last" and catch you in both deceit AND boobin

[–] lengau@midwest.social 26 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Not if Nickelodeon is right next to Cartoon Network. You hit "last" and then change the channel. That also gives you cover for why you're holding the remote and changing channels.

[–] bizzle@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago

60 and 59, bro 😎

[–] Underwaterbob@lemm.ee 22 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

In Canada, we had "Bleu Nuit". It was on at 2am, Saturday night, and played racy French movies. The only problem was the movies ran the gamut from 1.5 hour long naked lesbian makeout to a single scene with boobies somewhere in the middle. You took your chances. I swear there was one that didn't even show anything (but probably talked about sex. Dunno, I don't speak much French.)

[–] Outhouse_dayz@lemmy.world 95 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Make sure to hit last, channel up, last. Foolish proof. I'll never get caught.

[–] treadful@lemmy.zip 16 points 5 days ago

Here I thought I was the only one this clever.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 42 points 5 days ago

This guy faps.

[–] weegee90@lemmy.world 75 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] Grabthar@lemmy.world 46 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Had C-band satellite as a teen. All the good channels locked. But if the satellite Spacenet 1 transponder 18 was locked, you could "fine tune" the reception from say, Galaxy 3 transponder 18 by holding the step up or down button, and manually swing the dish halfway across the sky to the same position where Spacenet 1 is. As the descrambler thinks you are watching a different satellite altogether, there is no more lock. And since you never actually visited a bad channel, no way to tell with history or last buttons.

[–] Gerudo@lemm.ee 13 points 5 days ago (2 children)

How did you even find this out?

[–] Grabthar@lemmy.world 25 points 5 days ago

We knew that if you pressed the satellite button and channel up/down, it let you manually move the dish, and it didn't care how long you did it. There were also numbers to indicate the position of the dish. The rest was just sheer determination.

[–] BluJay320@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 5 days ago

Desperation

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[–] FardyCakes@lemmy.world 42 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] anarchrist@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Yeah but if you were watching Nick at nite the whole time, why did the channel number flick on the screen for a second?

[–] FardyCakes@lemmy.world 21 points 5 days ago

I switched away during the cash for gold commercial

[–] bulwark@lemmy.world 32 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Real Sex always seemed so not sexy. I mean, I'd watch it for boobs as a kid, but I was always kind of turned off by the whole show, idk.

[–] celsiustimeline@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Kinda like red shoe diaries. It wasn't porn, it was usually some kind of shitty crime movie or student arthouse film with boobs.

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[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 30 points 5 days ago (1 children)

My dad was a film historian, so we had HBO, Cinemax and Showtime in case anything came on that he needed to tape to show to a class.

This was quite helpful to teenage me in the era before internet porn.

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[–] Grimy@lemmy.world 26 points 5 days ago (1 children)

This is what I was trying to get off too. A few years later, I found out the art channel would sometimes play dirty movies on Saturday late at night but they usually involved incest(?). Then I switched to music channels when they started showing provocative music video so that was nice. I had one of those little tvs with the vcr integrated. Good times.

[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 19 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Should have bought a subscription to Radio and Electronics. I built a descrambler using their schematics.

Holy crap some of it still exists. https://schematicsforfree.com/files/Video/Circuits/Descrambling/1984-02%20Analog%20Cable%20TV%20Descramblng%20.pdf

[–] Grimy@lemmy.world 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Ha, knowing about this would have probably changed my life in more ways then one. I would have started my career as a hobby and saved a lot more time.

And God knows I would have been serious about learning this stuff as a teen if there was free porn at the end of it.

[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Its amazing I didn't end up in jail. I built a few of the descramblers and worst of all ended up with a 300 baud modem when the local chevrolet place Threw out a bunch of 'junk'. It was a non hayes bell modem and a pain in the ass to use but I would have taken a bullet for it. I built a blue box and later a black box. Then I got busy with free phone calls. Phreaking BBS's all over with great plans on taking control of the world around you. I still remember the date that they replaced the old analog switch in my town.

[–] Revan343@lemmy.ca 8 points 5 days ago (3 children)

I hear phreaking stories and I'm sad I was born a decade too late :(

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[–] Qkall@lemmy.ml 20 points 5 days ago (1 children)

y'all remember that vcr trick that you could unscramble all the PPV channels.... golden times... golden times.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 25 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Wait. what black magic is this? 12 year old me desperately wants to know.

[–] kyle@lemm.ee 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I have no idea. If you recorded something on vhs it didn't play it back unscrambled did it?

[–] Qkall@lemmy.ml 34 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (3 children)

so what you did was set your vcr to the ppv channel you wanted. and then kept flipping between channel 3 and 4 on the TV until it just unscrambled it. It apparently had to do with the vcr's ability to like fix when old vhs tapes would get wonky and like have mess and like lines. the color wasn't always right.... but for free WWF (i'm that old) ppv and... well pron... it was great.

[–] kyle@lemm.ee 10 points 5 days ago

Brilliant maneuvering

[–] rebelsimile@sh.itjust.works 19 points 5 days ago

the real hero is in the comments, 25 years later…

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[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 16 points 5 days ago (1 children)

...and the mirror on the bedroom door set so that I could see who's coming down the hall.

[–] skibidi@lemmy.world 19 points 5 days ago (1 children)

But if you could see them, they could see you ...

[–] Dearth@lemmy.world 11 points 5 days ago

But you were in the dark, camouflaged in your bedding. Anyone coming down the hall was a silhouette against the white walls of the hallway.

[–] Idreamofcheesy@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago

Here I am watching scrambled Sex and the City, wondering when it will get to the good part.

[–] SidewaysHighways@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago (4 children)
[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 6 points 5 days ago

Ah, a man of culture, I see. This was my choice.

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