days are coming! Just by default, without you doing a thing but continuing to exist, many of your problems will solve themselves.
I'm a male over 60 and have cried a lot in this life; I've been a lot of bad ways and places too, but I'm so so sure that there's a good chance at a good life for you if you just keep giving your life another day each day to exist. Don't cut it off because it hurts.
I know it's awful to live with that pain. Sometimes I still think about escaping the pain. But stay with life, stay with us, we all need you, you're very important to someone's future. Don't miss that. Hang on. Please.
I love you stranger.