this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
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Dr Merle Berger told patient Sarah Depoian sperm had come from an anonymous donor, new lawsuit claims

A leading Boston-based fertility doctor secretly impregnated a patient with his own sperm despite telling her that it had come from an anonymous donor, new a lawsuit has claimed.

According to a civil claim filed in US district court in Boston on Wednesday, Dr Merle Berger, founder of Boston IVF and a professor of obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive biology at Harvard medical school for over three decades, secretly impregnated a patient, Sarah Depoian, who had been seeking intrauterine insemination.

According to the claim, Berger told Depoian the sperm would come from an anonymous sperm donor “who resembled her husband, who did not know her, and whom she did not know”.

“This is an extreme violation. I am still struggling to process it. I trusted Dr Berger fully. We thought he would act responsibly and ethically,” Depoian said in a statement released by her attorneys.

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[–] BeefPiano@lemmy.world 65 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Depoian’s daughter, Carolyn Bester, who was born in 1981, only discovered that Berger was her biological father when she took at-home DNA tests from Ancestry.com and 23andMe this year.

For anyone wondering how he got caught. 42+ years later.

[–] Cosmonauticus@lemmy.world 18 points 11 months ago

Maybe the ppl who stole their user data told her

[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 16 points 11 months ago

That means it's possible there are lots of others who haven't/hadn't realized.

[–] CobblerScholar@lemmy.world 36 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Not the first time this kinda shit has happened either

[–] pennomi@lemmy.world 32 points 11 months ago

There was a serial case like this that happened decades ago and was only uncovered due to the fact that gene sequencing is so easy to access these days. Apparently now the 100+ children have this weird chat group of all the half siblings. I know because my friend was one of the babies.

[–] SeaJ@lemm.ee 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)

There is like one case a year of this happening. Use a fertility clinic staffed by women. No woman is going to go through the process of doing something similar.

[–] TheMauveAvenger@lemmy.world 20 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Wasn't there an article a year or two ago of a teacher serving people baked goods made with her SO's semen? Crazy doesn't recognize the boundaries of sex and gender.

[–] SeaJ@lemm.ee 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

More I mean a woman is not very likely to harvest her own eggs. And I still feel like a doctor stealing her SO's semen to implant into eggs is much less probable than a male doctor simply doing it himself. In fact we know it is less likely because cases like this article are an annual occurrence whereas I have never heard of a female fertility doctor using her SO's semen. Yes, crazy doesn't recognize the boundaries of sex but one requires several more steps than the other which ups the chances of getting caught.

I cannot find a single insurance of a woman doing that compared to the dozens of cases that I can find men doing it.

[–] asteriskeverything@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Yeah but like.... statistically it kind of does though? Or do we also have multiple cases where women forced sperm on unsuspecting people the same way these doctors who betrayed their patients in the most base, horrific way seem to pop up every year??

[–] SeaJ@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago

We do not. I cannot find one case of a female fertility doctor doing that.

[–] asteriskeverything@lemmy.world 21 points 11 months ago
[–] njm1314@lemmy.world 21 points 11 months ago

Simply amazing how often this seems to happen. I mean you can't read about fertility doctors without finding at least a few examples of this kind of thing happening.

[–] Illuminostro@lemmy.world 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Wow, a doctor with a God complex... weird.

[–] derf82@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

A lot of times it’s not even that. They just save a ton versus having to buy an expensive donor sample that needed screened and stored when they can just jerk off in a cup and pocket the difference.

[–] Illuminostro@lemmy.world -1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Nah, the narcissisism is the main driver.

[–] lolcatnip@reddthat.com 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

At this point, isn't that just the expected outcome of seeing a fertility doctor?

[–] ryathal@sh.itjust.works 2 points 11 months ago

Sadly yes, also insane that this isn't actually illegal in most states.

[–] krondo@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

Porn is getting more realistic by the hour.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 6 points 11 months ago

"Egads! My donated sperm is ruined! Hmmm... Perhaps if I disguise my own sperm as donor sperm... Ohohoho! Delightly devilish, Seymore."

[–] antlion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

That’s just rape with extra steps.

[–] atzanteol@sh.itjust.works -4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It's almost entirely unlike rape.

She wanted the pregnancy. There was no violence. She consented to the procedure.

It's a violation of trust, to be sure. But that's not rape.

[–] antlion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 11 months ago (2 children)

WHO defines violence as “the intentional use of physical force or power, threatened[2] or actual, against oneself, another person, or against a group or community, which either results in or has a high likelihood of resulting in injury, death, psychological harm, maldevelopment, or deprivation”.

So we could say this was a violent act. It was a violent sexual act. It involved penetration, probably done by the doctor himself. It was non-consensual. How is that not rape?

[–] atzanteol@sh.itjust.works 10 points 11 months ago (2 children)

If she never found out whose sperm it was she would be completely happy with the outcome. It was "anonymous" until it wasn't.

How can one suffer a "violent act" and not know about it for 20 years? I think you're stretching the definition of "violent" rather far.

The "penetration" and the entire procedure was completely consensual. That's how it's "not rape". Rape is a violent sexual act. Pregnancy is often an outcome but it isn't the goal.

This asshole injected himself into her family which is a huge betrayal of trust. Just not rape.

[–] antlion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It’s the same as poking a hole in a condom. That has been regarded as rape. Just because the sex or insemination is consensual, doesn’t mean rape can’t happen. If one party secretly changes the terms of the engagement, without the others permission, exerting power over them and harming them, it’s rape.

[–] atzanteol@sh.itjust.works 0 points 11 months ago

Poking a hole in a condom is non-consensual though. This woman wanted the pregnancy.

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Kind of an interesting analogy. I kinda feel the same way about how intoxicated people who are made ro have sex are victims but a much drunker person driving is a perpetrator.

Edit: at a certain point, our legal and medical understanding of agency has to be addressed for inconsistenies like this.

[–] chitak166@lemmy.world 0 points 11 months ago (1 children)

People like you are why words lose their meanings.

[–] antlion@lemmy.dbzer0.com -1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Word meanings do change over time.

[–] chitak166@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

I said lose, not change.

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] lazynooblet@lazysoci.al 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Well my boy. Have a seat. Daddy needs to have "the talk"

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

For real, how great would it be if this was a click-bait title and thats actually exactly what happened ?! Like they banged and she's bitching about the birds and the bees exclusively?

[–] lazynooblet@lazysoci.al 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

Maybe the "procedure" was done under general anesthetic. Ew, that would be much much worse.

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Dude, we were having fun here. Y u gotta go there?

Edit: btw, who's General Anaesthetic, I didn't realize it was a three-way with a millitary man no less ;)

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

So much do I love that you scare-quoted procedure, fucking LOL 🙈

Edit: Maybe she literally asked for it

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Is lazysocial really lazy, like chestnuts?!

[–] xc2215x@lemmy.world 0 points 11 months ago

Very strange.