this post was submitted on 25 Aug 2023
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There Was An Attempt

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There Was An Attempt, and they failed.

Share and discuss of when there was a sincere attempt made and they failed.


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Honestly, I don't believe its fair to say "all you can eat" unless its true. Otherwise, you should put some type of detailed limit.

But attempts must have been made and probably continue.

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[–] UsernameLost@lemmy.ml 35 points 1 year ago (7 children)

I went with my Vietnamese colleague to an all you can eat sushi place in Savannah after we spent two weeks doing hurricane response when I was still in the Coast Guard. This dude ate 32 rolls of sushi, and the old lady running the place loved him. At a certain point, I think she just wanted to see how many it would take before he tapped out. I think I ate ten or twelve rolls, and just sat there in awe while the dude just kept shoveling food into his mouth. To be fair, we'd been working 20 hour days for two weeks and the ship was running out of food before we pulled into port.

Later on, found out that same dude cheated on his wife, then found out his wife was pregnant, they tried to work it out, she had a miscarriage, and he filed for divorce two weeks later. Fun times

[–] RampageDon@lemmy.ml 17 points 1 year ago

That was an M. Night Shamalamadingdong twist to a story about buffets.

[–] Aviandelight@mander.xyz 10 points 1 year ago

I had a sushi binge once back in college. I went to eat lunch with my friends at the local Vietnamese place and we definitely overate. I was supposed to meet with my frat sponsor later that night and was worried that I might not get dinner before 9pm. Turns out my sponsor had planned to surprise me by taking me out to a fairly upscale sushi place for dinner since he knew I loved it. We get to the restaurant and he orders "the boat" which contains like 50+ pieces of sushi (for just the two of us). When the food came out I was worried I wouldn't be able to eat but turns out I can make extra space for sushi. I demolished that boat and ate more than my sponsor. He was legit impressed when I finally admitted that I had eaten a big lunch before hand.

[–] Potato_in_my_anus@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

It must've been the 100 rolls of sushi that provoke the cheating...

[–] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Imagine four guys that workout a lot, trying to gain mass after a cut, going to an all you can eat sushi place...

The waitress was just laughing her ass off when passing by our table and seeing another order slip, we filled the table four times before we felt we had enough...

[–] UsernameLost@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

Oh I can imagine. Two young military officers coming off a few weeks at sea working 20+ hour days led to this story. We went back with more people the next day, and I thought we were gonna clear the place out

[–] lemonadebunny@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Have you ever considered writing for the Saw films?

[–] UsernameLost@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] lemonadebunny@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 year ago

You're hired!

[–] lunaticneko@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What size? Normal or big (futomaki)?

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 30 points 1 year ago (1 children)

All you can reasonably eat within a given time limit does roll off the tongue

[–] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Would be more honest though. If I'm taking it slow eating then I'm taking it slow goddammit.

[–] pjhenry1216@kbin.social 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think this is targeting folks who finish eating a meal and then never leave the restaurant. So a more technical truth would be all you can eat within the reasonable definition of how long one meal lasts.

[–] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm fine with it as long as I can slowly make my way through a ginormous meal for hours

[–] pjhenry1216@kbin.social 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I honestly would be ok with someone limiting that. You're taking up table space along with not really following the concept I gave. I don't think anyone thinks a meal reasonably last hours. Two hours would likely be my limit to be honest if I magically inherited an all you can eat buffet restaurant. You'd be representing a very small portion of the target audience and would be a outsized loss on the model. Maybe I could be convinced a little longer, but at a certain point, you're not only representing a loss in margins, but a loss in being able to serve other people. Like, I get the idea that someone wants to "take advantage" but it's not really helping the cause to keep restaurants like this in business. Exploiting everything you can is just not a mindset I can get behind unless it's against a big corporation doing the same to their employees and contractors. Which is usually not the case behind all you can eats. Some are franchises which are debatable, but most are single owned restaurants.

[–] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 2 points 1 year ago

The concept was all you can eat. You're gambling that I eat little enough to make big bucks on it. It's a shit system if there's no possibility of winning.

[–] DrChickenbeer@artemis.camp 27 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is quoting a famous stand up comedy routine by John Pinnette:

https://youtu.be/aLkTuWdKrqY?si=W6b8bXI4IgvSSjiW

[–] kool_newt@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

This runs through my head every time I think about buffets.

[–] itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml 22 points 1 year ago (5 children)
[–] Techmaster@lemm.ee 6 points 1 year ago

You be here four hour! You go home now!

[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Eat vegetable!

[–] TurnItOff_OnAgain@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Get out of the line

[–] sverit@feddit.de 2 points 1 year ago

You scare my wife!

[–] TronnaRaps@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 year ago

Eat brocorri

[–] El_Segundo@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

Do these seem like the actions of a man who had "ALL HE COULD EAT?"

seriously though just put a 1 hour limit on it

[–] ChillPill@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

what did you do after you left the all you can eat buffet?

We pretty much went straight home.

Mrs Simpson, may I remind you that you are under oath.

We drove around for 4 hours looking for another all you can eat seafood buffet

[–] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"You can't make me stop. The sign says 'All you can eat for 16.99."

"Yes sir. 4 plates is all you can eat for $16.99.

[–] KrisND@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Each plate you get a semi-perm tattoo on your hand to keep track.

[–] creditCrazy@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

It's all you can eat in 4 hours restaurant

[–] aesthelete@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

Alright, who tried to squat in this restaurant after paying for the buffet?

[–] Pixel@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 1 year ago

This is funny but not a great way to express it as a business. Why not simplify and clarify, like: "all you can eat* buffet. * limited to one meal in one hour" perhaps add "no loitering" but maybe not needed

[–] kool_newt@lemm.ee 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

When I was a kid 84 yrs ago, me and my friend would go to Sizzler for all-you-can-eat. We'd stay about 4 hrs, we would try to eat as much as we could and try to drop a deuce to eat more lol.

...and I just realized that's like bullemia of the ass.

[–] cubedsteaks@lemmy.today 0 points 1 year ago

When I was a kid 84 yrs ago

lol 😂

[–] Mr_Blott@feddit.uk 4 points 1 year ago

Imagine if you will...

A society so morally bankrupt....

That a sign like this is necessary...

😂

[–] Pulptastic@midwest.social 3 points 1 year ago

All you can eat 1 hour

[–] FarceMultiplier@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 year ago

It's not all you want to it, it's all you CAN eat! Bwahahahahaha!!

[–] TomMasz@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My school has labeled the main cafeteria "All You Care to Eat", which I still think has a loophole.

[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

"... in the 11 minutes you have scheduled for lunch"

[–] jbk@discuss.tchncs.de 0 points 1 year ago

washee-washee read this out in my head