this post was submitted on 14 Jul 2023
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To answer the questions myself, I'm non-binary and agender. Non-binary is mostly just a label I use to help other people understand that I don't fit into any preconceived notions they likely have about me. I prefer offering up my needs and wants as they become relevant, or having conversations about how people should interact with me before making assumptions.
The one thing I'd like to share with the community and the world, is that you need to practice and incorporate more gender neutral language in the world. I cannot stress how much we need to do away with sir and ma'am, in particular. I absolutely hate both of these honorifics and they're used way too much over the phone. Call people boss, dude, mate, chief, your majesty, commander, captain, comrade, friend, buddy, liege... literally anything else, please!
Just get rid of all honorifics (including Mrs/Ms/Mr/Mx/Dr). Boss, chief, majesty, commander, captain, liege, queen etc are fine if they are used used ironically, but if they just try to replace honorifics, then they're just as bad imo (as someone who doesn't care much about the gender associated with them).
Use y'all! It's gender neutral and just plain cute
I feel that - "guys" is a familiar enough habit that it still takes conscious effort sometimes to use "folks". "Pal" in my experience comes across a lot like "champ" and doesn't help the conversation.
My grandmother used to scold me that I was to call women "miss" unless corrected, along with other proper manners from decades before me. The idea that it's important to respect people and address them in the way that helps them to be comfortable is what the real takeaway is, but it's tough to shake those habits sometimes.
Same, I've been changing "guys" to "folks" and "man" to "fam".
Because "come on man" has been used for so long that one has been harder. Using fam feels a little out of place for my millennial self but I think Gen Z found a great replacer with "come on fam" and I can get behind that.