this post was submitted on 04 Jan 2025
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It’s like using “just” in emails. Guys don’t do it, but women are seen as bitchy or bossy if they don’t.
Versus
The latter feels much more direct. Women will tend to use the former while men will tend to use the latter. Because for guys it conveys authority; I’m checking in on this, you should have an update. While for women they need to downplay their authority; I’m looking for an update, but don’t mind me. Because if women stop using “just” they’re suddenly seen as demanding, bossy, too authoritative, etc…
I'm a man and I still use "just" because even if a man doesn't use it I see them as aggressive and dickish. I feel it's just more polite to use it.