this post was submitted on 25 Oct 2024
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What qualities do you covet?

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[–] dumbass@leminal.space 20 points 1 week ago (2 children)

That I was as socially confident as other people seem to be, I don't care if it's all a facade, I want to be able to use the facade.

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 4 points 1 week ago

Like with most skills, one becomes confident with practice.

I'm a natural introvert and an only child and therefore has little practice of taking to others. I had no idea of how important small talk is. I learned by working in a bar, where social interaction can't really be dodged and found out that social interaction isn't that daunting as it seemed to me.

It still not my biggest hobby yet I'm not longer afraid of social interaction like I used to be.

[–] bizarroland@fedia.io 13 points 1 week ago

What helps me is knowing that everyone is fucking awkward.

I've met thousands upon thousands of people and I have never met anyone who is not socially awkward, just a lot of people who are socially skilled in different ways.

The people who don't come across as awkward are the people who acknowledge their awkwardness and own it, who give themselves an opportunity to fumble with their awkwardness and to get used to it the same way you do with any other difficult thing like math or reading or studying or dance or games.

I said all of that to say, not being awkward is not a talent, it is a skill, and you can learn it.