this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2024
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Autism
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I'm in the same boat. I was diagnosed late in my life and even then, being "highly functional" means that "I don't look autistic", so most people won't even take it seriously.
I, involuntarily, learned control myself and put some safeties in place before a meltdown so it doesn't happen. But sometimes it's not that easy to avoid one, and almost 4 months ago, I had one (maybe the first in 6-7 years).
I did become almost non verbal, and only with a huge effort I was able to articulate some very few words to explain my SO what was happening to me (was a first time for them). After I explained, I went completely non verbal for the whole next day.
Only once I've been non verbal for a long period (around a month) after a meltdown.
Can you expand on this?
I understand enough of my body to recognize when one can happen. And it's not always easy but, I'll give you an example.
Sirens in general, but specifically those from first responders are overwhelming for me so I always carry a pair of earplugs to soften their noise. They are one of my possible meltdown causes, and not long ago I was in my bike coming back from work and happened that in a very narrow street in which I was, an ambulance got trapped in the middle of the traffic. I realized my body was going into meltdown because I started hyperventilating so I quickly stopped, got down of the bike and sat down trying to breath and stim as I could. In the end it didn't cause a meltdown (although I had a panic attack).
In my case, I start losing control of my body when a meltdown is happening so as soon as i notice a threat, I run a list of possible escape scenarios. And if there are non, I mitigate. But well, I always carry earplugs, some toys and a pair of ANC headphones with me with a playlist of soothing songs "just in case".