this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2024
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Online dating industry in crisis as shares fall and nearly half of all users report negative experiences on the apps

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[–] IphtashuFitz@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

My wife and I met through eHarmony about 15 years ago now, and have been happily married over 10 now. Prior to meeting her I’d tried a handful of other dating apps but never had any luck. I had very similar stories about ghosting, unmatching, etc.

I have no idea if eHarmony still works the way it used to, but back when I met my wife it was fairly different from the likes of Match.com, Tinder, etc. When setting up your profile you had to answer a bunch of fairly specific questions that covered everything from if you were looking for casual dates, long term, marriage, if you have/want kid, etc. to things like activities you enjoy to how important things like family, religion, career, etc. are to you.

When they show you a potential match you get to see how they answered those questions along with a more open profile. If both of you indicate interest in communicating with each other then you’re first led through some rounds of guided communication to begin with. As I recall you would both pick 3 or 4 multiple choice questions from a list of 30 or so to ask the other person, and they would do the same. After you both answered those questions then you would do the same with more open-ended questions and so on. Only after a few rounds of that would you be able to chat/email with the other person.

What I realized while using eHarmony is that it kind of forced you to invest time & some conscious effort to communicate with potential matches. That resulted in more of them being open to proceed further. I went on dates with a few women I met on eHarmony before I met my wife.

As I said before I have no idea if eHarmony still operates this way or not. That’s how they did things 15 years ago and it could have changed a lot since then.

[–] Dkarma@lemmy.world 23 points 3 months ago (3 children)

From what I hear 15 years ago online dating is wildly different than today.

[–] Sharkwellington@lemmy.one 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

15 years ago the first iPhone came out. Probably related.

[–] Mac@mander.xyz 2 points 3 months ago

I had an iPhone 15 years ago so let me apply what i remember from that to solving a problem with your current phone. lol

[–] Scrollone@feddit.it 5 points 3 months ago

OKCupid was a serious service 15 years ago. Now it's borderline scam.

[–] grrgyle@slrpnk.net 2 points 3 months ago

Hey that doesn't sound so bad.