this post was submitted on 13 Jun 2023
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Autism

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I often feel like I'm "not autistic enough", like I'm faking it or I'm just misdiagnosed because I don't have a lot of the big signs typical of someone on the spectrum. I was diagnosed when I was young so that makes it feel like maybe the diagnosis was wrong. I don't know if I just mask really well or if I'm lying to myself. It's rough. Can anyone relate to that or give me some words of wisdom?

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[โ€“] DivergentHarmonics@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Yes absolutely! I have no diagnosis, and possibly it would be difficult to see, because common characteristics are not there. No ADS but an above-average awareness. I do understand most jokes (but find many not funny), and i'm very good with irony. Good motoric skills. No single special interest (but it constantly changes so that i know a bit about many things) etc.
I notice it changes. I also notice after my whole life had changed drastically that i got much more sensitive, and as i went half-hermit, those autistic traits became stronger. Others i learned to overcome -- i mean really, not masking. Eye contact for example, i just trained ituntil i had lost that anxiety. I have spent years watching my patterns. ๐Ÿ™„
I think i'm above-typical in the spectrum, or more like part-time autistic. When i am, it can be debilitating, though.

That's why i make a distinction between neurodivergent and "autistic". Those are different aspects of my being.

Perhaps you can even snap out of it? https://lemmy.world/post/67226