this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2023
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[–] APassenger@lemmy.one -1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I'm not jumping in to start fights. I jump in to ask why you're doing it.

There's a difference. Clown faces (a pattern,, not an instance), vomit emoji... all that is is you doing something for your feels and to feel better than. They do exactly zero for anything a normal, mature peraon would hope to generate.

You say you want meaningful exchange and you doggedly defend yourself as you bring the discourse down to single emoji and knee-jerk judgments.

You're creating an unhelpful dynamic. Being likeable helps. Being right is "logically" enough. For persuasion, it is a distant second on a good day.

Being more likeable and less glib can help. Or, You're not here to help. You're here to feel better than. Your choice and you get to choose, but be consistent. If it's the later, don't criticize it in others, please.

Let's go one further and I'll ask other than when I told you themat you required evidence and you were being a hypocrite, when did I demand evidence over and over? Or do you not know what sealioning is?

I'm not demanding evidence. I'm asking why you're so darn incivil to so many people. You look like an unsympathetic Don Quixote and it helps none of your points.

And if you're not here to persuade, why post so many of a specific kind of article.

Again. I don't follow you around. I'm in certain communities for a reason. And then you shit all over them.

It's daft, touched-in-the-head kind of behavior.

[–] yogthos@lemmy.ml -2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

It's weird that you keep asking why I reply to people in kind when I've explicitly explained why repeatedly. I get offended when people sealion into my posts and make personal attacks against me. There's no great mystery here.

I don't feel the need to act mature or dignified with people I consider to be assholes. When somebody slides into my threads to call me a tankie, I have zero respect for that person. It's that simple. I'm not the one creating the unhelpful dynamic, I just respond in kind to people who attack me because they don't like the content of what I say.

Being more likeable and less glib can help, but none of us are perfect. My personal character flaw is that I don't take it well when people attack me in this way.

I'm here to persuade people who are willing to have a civil discussion engaging with the topic of the post. You'll find that I'm always civil talking to people who are civil in kind regardless of whether I agree with them or not.

So, when you see me post in certain communities you frequent, and you have a differing opinion then feel free to explain what you disagree on and have a discussion about it. Be the change you want to see in the world and all that.

[–] APassenger@lemmy.one -1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You need to Google "sea lion troll."

You're not using the term correctly. Or keep doing it wrong, up to you.

I understand that you've answered that you get to decide if a person is worthy of respect or dignity or decency. I find it highly ironic since you seem to exist on a part of the spectrum that would want those things for (almost?) everyone. That may not be true, but you seem inclined to push socialist ideas. I'm very open to that, personally. Many Americans are; the culture wars are used to distract and divide and it works.

If I've persisted in my question on why you become knee-jerk incivil, it's because the answers so far have landed as "because." Your most recent response hits more authentically and I appreciate it. I've sparred with trolls. I've sparred with those who genuinely disagree for good (and bad) reasons. Authentic, mature conversation appeals to me.

Dropping to name calling (emojis) based on the first reply on a thread lowers discourse. I'll stop here. I just wish that shit didn't happen so much.

I'm not your opponent but you sure set out that way when you correctly determined I'm in and from the US. The combativeness was not deserved, it was off-putting and I am much less likely to want to engage. Shrug.

[–] yogthos@lemmy.ml -1 points 1 year ago

It basically comes down to the paradox of tolerance. I don't think it's worth trying to have an actual discussion when people are trolling me which simply sucks up my time and validates what they're doing.

Again, I didn't determine you're my opponent based on the fact that you're from US. That seemed to be the case base on the derogatory personal attacks you made against me, such as calling me a tankie. That was off-putting to me, and hence why I didn't see any point in trying to have a mature discussion. I'm perfectly happy to change my mind if you're willing to have civil discourse as we're having now.