this post was submitted on 01 Sep 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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I have given up trying to find a girlfriend. Even though, I am outgoing, have hobbies (I dance, which is actually filled with women), go to parties, talk to plenty of women. But I keep hearing the same thing over and over again: "I am just not so into skinny guys."

I think this is fair from the woman's perspective. I for one am only motivated to date attractive women. So, them not wanting to settle for less actually makes very good sense to me. There is absolutely no hate or bitterness regarding that. Fuck all that: 'all women are whores'-noise.

That being said, I think I should just consider myself celibate by virtue of my own standards. But now bitterness is starting to take hold of me. Bitterness about my life and to me as a person. As I said I am very outgoing and don't want to become the cynical asshole around my friends.

So how do I stop this?

Edit: I go to the gym on a regular basis.

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[–] Wanderer@lemm.ee -1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

You need to drink your way to weight gain.

Try 4 meals a day if you can but get some big calorie drinks in you.

Stop looking at the weight in the gym and start looking at the weight on the scales.

But I'm (athletic) skinny and punched out of my weight loads. How? I don't fucking know. Think girls are just really comfortable around me and for some that works, usually the cute quiet ones. Or sometimes I been blackout drunk and magic happens.

Edit: Just get really drunk and lower your standards. I've done that too.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net -3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I'm not into skinny guys

That seems way easier to fix than "I'm not so into fat fucks." Just eat more and stop going to the gym.

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[–] sunzu2@thebrainbin.org -3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Market price set with supply and demand.

If you are getting zero hits, you need to adjust the price. This is game 101.

Or stay single but I don't get that angle but that is a strategy as any other.

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[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world -4 points 2 months ago (2 children)

You only want to date attractive women. You aren't attracted to many women. Those ones don't seem attracted to you.

Does that sound right?

That's a nonstandard combination, and that's ok. You might be Ace, but not Aro. An Ace person (or someone elsewhere on the sexuality spectrum) could hold women to a high beauty standard for aesthetic reasons. While still having low requirements for the romantic side (i.e. be willing to compromise to get romance)

Figuring out yourself will then dictate your dating approach. If you are Ace, then finding a beautiful Ace girlfriend is not the same approach as finding a straight one.

All I know is, my desire for sex would (did) easily override some arbitrary beauty requirement. I think most generic straight guys would agree. So if this isn't happening, it's worth your time to ask why.

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