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Based on the bit of research I have done, along with creating https://lemmyonline.com/
It seems you are correct. A small handful of servers contains roughly 95% of the user-base.
I think the intended way for this to work, certain communities can be hosted on their own servers. However, it appears most of the popular communities migrating away from reddit, all flocked to lemmy.world, which is likely contributing to it being overloaded.
A very valid question I am also interested in knowing. I’m wondering how much management it will be for me - who created his own instance and am having to find all the other communities myself. Or if my instance is doing anything but providing me a unique instance address and name.
I've suggested a routing protocol to the lemmy devs - to use federated instances to route all the messages to other federated instances. The idea was received with some interest, but it seems that people believe that there's still a ton of performance that can be squeezed out from the current architecture through optimisations.
Does anyone have any idea what specs are required to run alemmy server, how about the "big" ones at the moment, just to get an idea of the scale of the challenge?
Here is a post from the admin of sh.itjust.works talking about his setup that is currently handling 2k+ users pretty well, and according to the latest update 10 minutes ago still has a lot more spare capacity to go.
I've seen some posts about self-hosted Lemmy servers that run very well on the cheapest VPS tiers that hosting services can provide (the 2-5 USD/month range).
I just spun up my own instance as well and it does feel a bit like I'm just pulling from the biggest instances and feeding my own without really being able to give much back.
Since Lemmy instance are not backed by commercial interest, but rather by nice volunteers and donors that have money and time to spare, they will be heavily affected by economic downturns (we still can see commercial interests still affect users negatively tho with reddit). Here are my thoughts on the matter:
That is why you should always back up your comments on your personal device, would be nice if lemmy had an automated way of doing this (I should look into this more)