They've actually slightly improved this lately, they ask about what they determine are risky sexual behaviors (ie hookups) with no gender attached now. The one thing is that you can't be actively taking PrEP and donate because it would obscure the HIV testing results (that they ought to be doing every time, multiple times!).

Source: https://www.redcrossblood.org/donate-blood/how-to-donate/eligibility-requirements/lgbtq-donors.html