this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] originalucifer@moist.catsweat.com 74 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Malix@sopuli.xyz 51 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

this is me, doing php and javascript on daily basis.

[–] mesamunefire@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Fun fact, a glass of whisky is a good rubber duck substitute

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Gotta hit that Ballmer peak.

[–] lichtmetzger@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 2 weeks ago

Same here. It's not so bad. It get's really bad when I have to work on older PHP5 projects, though. Or shudder WordPress projects without OOP.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 66 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

It is a poor craftsman who blames their tools, but I wouldn't be so poor if these tools weren't so shit.

[–] masterofn001@lemmy.ca 38 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

10 print "hello"
20 goto hell

I'm a bad programmer.

[–] eldavi@lemmy.ml 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

i have this pep talk with myself every time i have to switch languages for a project (especially between python & java) and i can't remember how to do it at first.

[–] einkorn@feddit.org 23 points 2 weeks ago

During university I gave additional lessons for lower semesters and at times had to juggle three languages: Java, Typescript and plain JavaScript for that one professor who thought TS sucks.

Coding on the spot got really messy at times.

[–] bl_r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] python@programming.dev 19 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] bl_r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Sorry, but you weren’t the type I thought you were all the time

[–] magic_lobster_party@fedia.io 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The type is dynamic. It can be whatever you wish.

[–] skulblaka@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

You say : the type is dynamic

We hear : the type is imaginary

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 2 weeks ago

You didn't need that opening parenthesis in python

[–] Xanthrax@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Try lua as a middle ground. It's object based but more classical with the syntax.

[–] gregor@gregtech.eu 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] bl_r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 21 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)

It’s the best scripting language I know of, but man I hate dynamically types languages. I am so used to rust and C/C++ that reading any large script or program will drive me insane

And the whitespace instead of {} tokens…

[–] thebestaquaman@lemmy.world 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The whitespace doesn't bother me at all, but holy hell! Any time I'm trying to understand a Python program/library that's anything above a couple thousand lines of code, I instantly feel a burning hate for dynamic typing.

I love Python for scripting- in large part because of dynamic typing. IMO it's just not a language made for building large infrastructures.

[–] bl_r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago

Exactly.

I use it a lot on my systems for very simple scripts because I am significantly more experienced in python compared to bash.

I remember getting given a 10k line python script which “was the documentation” for an API i had to interact with using powershell. I hated life so much because of that stupid project.

[–] porous_grey_matter@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 weeks ago

I've had the joy of working on a python project with strict type checking enforced in CI and wow is it a different experience. Am a big fan.

[–] kn33@lemmy.world 0 points 2 weeks ago

I can handle dynamically typed, but the whitespace thing kills me. I kind of really like PowerShell.

[–] independantiste@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 weeks ago
[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

There’s no such thing as bad languages just bad programers anything outside of raw machine code is Just coping for a lack of skill.

[–] AdamEatsAss@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Machine code? If you can't build a circuit to solve your problem it's a lack of skill.

[–] stupidcasey@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Honestly probably easier than writing in machine code.

[–] Edie@lemmy.ml 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I'm not a bad programmer, nix is just a horrible programming language

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 2 weeks ago

I have to bounce around between languages so much I don't really think I'm fluent in anything anymore. I may not be a bad programmer, but some of my programming is bad.

[–] deegeese@sopuli.xyz 7 points 2 weeks ago

Or maybe it’s the wrong language for the task. Macromedia flash is pretty good for animated websites, an enterprise asset management system, not so much.

My current cross to bear in an app written in Mulesoft because “it’s great with Salesforce” but completely unsuited for bulk data transfers.

Sucks to be stuck with bad choices made before you got there.

[–] someacnt_@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

There is no good programming language, even including the ones people do not use.

[–] affiliate@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] toastal@lemmy.ml 7 points 2 weeks ago

Haskell devs like to write code, not maintain it. A bunch of libraries get written, but get abandoned shortly after for something new & shiny.

[–] someacnt_@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If only haskell devs were writing documentations, instead of going "type sigs is all the documentation you need!"

[–] BlushedPotatoPlayers@sopuli.xyz 0 points 2 weeks ago

They moved from python?

[–] mogoh@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 weeks ago
[–] yogsototh@programming.dev 0 points 2 weeks ago

Clojure is pretty decent.

[–] electricprism@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 weeks ago

What's the name of that ancient Java UX again?

[–] LittleFeather@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 weeks ago

Hm, why this sound so familiar :D

[–] SsxChaos@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 weeks ago

It's just node.js that's why.. you're a deno dude now it's just your company that is still delayed not you

[–] the_toast_is_gone@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

This is what I tell myself every time I find out the hard way what documented parts of Visual Basic didn't make it into VBScript.

[–] Spitzspot@lemmings.world 1 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

"A bad workman blames his tools."

[–] davel@lemmy.ml 12 points 2 weeks ago

We don’t always have the luxury of choosing our tools, and some tools are garbage.

[–] trucy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 weeks ago

"A good workman chooses good tools"