Gaming

1976 boy here. Grew up playing on the BBC and sat waiting patiently for starfield.

Never too old.

Other people's judgement should never get in the way of a good hobby and giving yourself downtime.

There shouldn't be a cutoff, of course. As the current demographic gets older, I bet the stigma will keep dying down. Sorry to hear about your difficulties, though.

I’m 34 and can’t say I’ve ever had this problem. All the people I’ve gone out with just see it as a hobby I have and nothing else. I think the may problem is when people assume you don’t have any other hobbies or don’t do anything else because you like video games. I find that as I get older I’m gravitating towards vastly different hobbies so when the topic of video games comes up their reaction is usually what you describe: “Ah my kids love them!” then we move on to the next topic. That has never been a deal breaker though, which I assume is what you’re somewhat implying in your post.

It's becoming more accepted. I have a few friends in their 40s who are the biggest gamers I know. You may be on the edge of what might be seen as an "acceptable " age, but it is very common for adults. I can see how dating might bring out the judgement in some people, but you shouldn't have to repress that part of yourself, especially since you do it with your kids. As it becomes more and more common many people won't stop doing something they loved doing their whole lives.

I'm about your age (48) and game. I don't think there's a cut-off date as such, but it's a little bit of several things.

There is certainly a generational angle. When we were growing up in the 80s and early 90s, playing computer games was definitely not an activity targeted at adults, and gamers were generally seen as geeks and nerds. This changed of course, but other people who grew up at the same time as us but never got into games may still hang onto that image.

Gender also plays a role, women our age are a lot less likely to have ever been into games. My girlfriend for example has no problems with it but she never gamed herself and doesn't really understand it. If I think of female friends and acquaintances, I know only one woman who games as well, but she's already 8 years younger.

There's also the fact that many men do in fact grow out of gaming as they get older, start to have more responsibilities and less free time and when other interests and hobbies start to compete for that limited free time. I notice that in myself too, it's a lot less important to me now than it was 25 years ago.

Then there's the slightly uncomfortable fact that many women simply find it unattractive when a man lists gaming as a hobby, and see it as a red flag, perhaps because they associate it with certain stereotypes of people who are obsessive about it and whose whole personality revolves around gaming, perhaps because they have previous bad experiences with it, or perhaps because it's something they simply can't relate with. Maybe gamers are to women what "horse girls" are to men? :)

I think the best way to handle it on the dating scene is to show that you're a functioning adult with a well rounded personality and a variety of interests, who just happens to game as well. At the end of the day, you have to have enough common ground to start a relationship with someone.

I'm a 47 year old guy and I'm not ashamed to say that I enjoy video games. I always have, from playing Head over Heels on a Speccy +2 to ESO and Valorant on my self built PC.

I'm 51. I have house, wife, two kids and I run my own company. I could never, ever think about stop gaming. I've been doing this since the 80s. It's my hobby and my way to socialize and wind-down. It is my go-to when I need to get my mind off things. I'd be a literal wreck without it. I'm not ashamed of it and I will talk about it with anyone curious. Just like they might talk about sailing boats or golf trips. No difference.

Due to various life circumstances, I'm also on the dating scene and to most women I meet, around my age, video games are anathema. When I say that I like them it's usually meet with an "oh dear" or a "my son would probably love to talk to you about them, I find them really boring"

That is a really shitty and demeaning way to speak to someone. What the actual fuck? Very rude.
Have you ever tried to tell them that insulting someones hobbies isn't the best way to go about meeting people?

Even if there was a cutoff age, it would be changing every year as millennials age up and the gaming industry does a better job at targeting older players.

Yeah i'm in my 30s and still enjoy playing games, nice way to relax at the end of the day.

Related question though: any good Minecraft channels on youtube that aren't made for children? I'm just starting to get in to minecraft now and it's been super fun, but the youtube playthroughs I've been looking at have all been...seeming to not be catering to an audience my age, to put it politely.

My dad told me repeatedly while I was growing up that I would "outgrow" video games. There were several times where I thought that this had come to pass. But time and time again I have found myself going back to video games. I'm now turning 29 and I still love playing video games.

Early forties here. Also grew up with the Spectrum. In my admittedly slightly nerdy friend circle it's completely normal. People always talking about interesting games in just the same way as they would movies. People playing games with their kids. Lots of talk about Tears of the Kingdom at our last gathering. I assume for younger people it's even more normal.

All this is to say, I don't think there's a static absolute age cut-off. I think we're probably the first generation that will see a substantial portion continue to identify as small-g 'gamers' well into retirement. If they're is a (moving, getting older) age cut-off, at 47 now, maybe you're just on the upper side of the tipping point?

I'm mid thirties myself and games are what I grew up with and it's how I like to enjoy my storytelling. I think it's entirely lost on some people how different games are as a media. My SO and I have had chats about it and she understands that it's a whole different experience than a movie or tv and appreciates my enthusiasm for truly great games.

I can totally understand that some people just don't jive with games but I'm so grateful my SO tolerates my gaming even though she doesn't partake much herself.

I feel no pressure to stop so I don't see myself stopping gaming anytime soon. You just need to find the right one, they don't even need to like games, they just need to like you as a person.

When you get bored lol

Who’s making the micro-transaction gig profitable? 9 year olds? I’m willing to bet Epic games has netted about 1k from me since it’s initial release. I figure if I go out with friends I’m dropping 100.00 easily. If I stay in one night and spend 60.00 on vbucks I’m still saving 40 and I’m certainly not less entertained.

I’m 53, I’ll be playing games until the arthritis is too bad or I go blind.

I'm in my fourties. I've fought clanwars in MoHAA with my now wife. We've spent an embarrasing amount of time raiding in WoW and by now we've had servers running for Ark, Valheim and Vrising with our daughter. She's more into Roblox though..

Born before 86 and it's one of my main hobbies. A large percentage of my friends are gamers of various kinds. I don't think there's a cut off, just people that get too caught up in defining what adulthood is and not letting fun and individuality be part of it.

It sounds like your dating the wrong women. Why do you need to add someone that’s going to make judgements of you based on a hobby? Date people that improve your life; not make you question it.

Never too old and if anyone says it is just ignore them, not their life to dictate. I will never understand why anyone would give up what they find fun because someone else finds it silly or 'not socially acceptable'. Its just them trying to press their own opinions of whats acceptable like its a fact.

I'll never stop gaming, if someone didn't like that to the point they judge me or try and tell me to stop its not a person I'd care to be friends with or talk to anyways. I'm not that old but when I was younger I got berated all the time for gaming, very glad I ignored all that nonsense and kept doing what I enjoyed. I've got a good career path out of it and friends I met online through gaming who now live close by.

Back in the ancient Greek era there were people worried that printed books were going to rot peoples' minds because they would just be absorbed in them 24/7.

Do what you wanna do, dude.

My backlog of games isn't going to play itself. I have no choice. (in my 50s)

If anything, playing games keeps your mind into complex entertainment which should keep the brain young. Sure beats just mindlessly watching TV all day though just make sure you still touch grass every once in awhile.

I’m 40, but I play online with quite a few people who are my age or older. On the dating scene, I wouldn’t know because I’ve been married 19 years, but I’d guess that there is some reluctance from women (especially those who don’t also play) to have a partner who would fit the stereotypical “gamer ignoring his girlfriend” or dude who’s a misogynistic dick online who uses games as a way to flex his imaginary hyper masculinity.

My move has always been, and will always be, to prioritize people in the room, especially her, when I’m in the headset. If that means we lose, we lose. It’s just a game (though I love them and often get totally immersed). Most of my longtime gaming friends with families (I have two kids as well) completely understand, and I do the same when they have IRL interruptions.

As for if there’s a cutoff? HELL NO.

As for if there’s a generational gap? Hell yes…but I’d say you’re just at the bleeding edge. Keep doing you and looking for like minded people and you’ll just be the oldest of the “Old Man League Bball team, Videogames Edition”. My crew loves our version of that guy… and so does his long time partner. 🙂

is it something to do with the progression of games into popular culture and people born after, say, 1986 will not see it as unacceptable?

I think that's exactly it. Gen X was the first generation to experienced playing video games for their entire lives. Video games, as with all new things, tended to be poo-poo'ed by the older generation and as such, many Gen Xers elected not to get in to video gaming.

I think if you were of any younger generation, you would find responses on dates to be quite different.

I am almost 40 also, and game alot. One thing to remember that our generation is the first to actually game their whole life, nes etc made gaming popular.

Older generations haven't had mainstream gaming, so it is wierd to think people born in 50-60 to game, because games didn't exist when they were young. We on the other hand have grown with the games.

So I think from ten year on, it will be normal to have LAN parties in your elderly home.