this post was submitted on 14 Feb 2024
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[–] ggBarabajagal@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago (7 children)

Tipping is more than just a custom; there really is a culture to it. If you're tipping only because you know the server makes less than minimum wage from the restaurant (or that greedy restaurant owners are completely to blame for this injustice), I think you may be misunderstanding an aspect of this culture.

Working in a restaurant is as hard a retail job as there is, and working as a server is often the hardest job in the restaurant. Being a truly good server requires a rare mix of people skills, math skills, memory, and a thick skin. So why do people choose to take the hardest job there is in the whole restaurant, when it pays less than all the other jobs?

Most servers end up getting paid better than the people doing other jobs in the restaurant. In most restaurants, servers make more than minimum wage. At the end of their shifts, most servers in turn tip-out the front-of-the-house employees, such as hosts and bussers, who often do only make minimum wage.

A truly excellent server may be the highest-paid employee for an entire shift -- that certainly includes the manager and anyone else on salary, and it may even include the owner, when you add in labor and upkeep costs.

In order to make all that money, however, this server has to work at all the times that everyone else is out having fun -- Friday night, Saturday night, Sunday morning. This server must put up with drunks, picky eaters and other narcissists, as well as seating errors and kitchen mistakes, all with a smile, for six or eight or ten hours straight. This server, who earns more than anyone else on the shift, is working harder than anyone else on the shift.

This is the other aspect that I wanted to address. Tipping culture is what gives that excellent server the opportunity to earn a better wage, more appropriate to the effort and expertise they devote to the job.

I'm sure this all sounds very capitalist, because it is. This may not be the most capitalism-friendly forum, I know, but I'm not trying to make any larger argument here.

I'm just saying that to me, it seems like this should be a "don't hate the players" (owners, managers, servers, rich/drunk people who like to leave big tips) "hate the game" (tipping culture). And even if you do hate tipping culture, it couldn't hurt to consider how it works for the people who don't hate it.

[–] ferralcat@monyet.cc 7 points 9 months ago

I worked at a restaurant as a kid washing dishes and servers did fuck all, made bank, and complained about how it wasn't enough. I lost all respect for waiters at that job (but I saw the same behaviors repeated too later in life. In the bay you'd notice that as soon as you didn't order an overpriced cocktail with dinner, your waiter would peg you as a low spender and basically just never come back unless you flagged them down).

Cooks... Good cooks are nuts to me. They'll be cooking 10 different things simultaneously with timers running in their heads. I had no idea how they managed it.

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[–] Desistance@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

This is why I never eat out anymore. Restaurants are complaining that their customer base is shrinking. I wonder why...

[–] LemmyIsFantastic@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

Never once have I had any person be rude to me for a 20% tip.

[–] gearheart@lemm.ee 9 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I will probably get hate but I also tip based on the before tax portion.

[–] MacDangus@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

This is what you are supposed to do

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[–] mellowheat@suppo.fi 9 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

If I should tip 25% for a $70 meal, the meal shouldn't be $70. It should be $88. If the waiters are shit that's fixed by me (and other people) never going to that place again, not by waving a bunch of money at their faces and telling them to dance.

[–] asteriskeverything@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago (2 children)

25% ??! Damn I remember when it was 10%, or maybe just the tax if you were cheap. The American public is way better at giving underpaid workers wages that keep up with inflation than the government!

[–] explodicle@local106.com 9 points 9 months ago

But a fixed percentage already includes inflation

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