this post was submitted on 18 Nov 2023
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[–] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 59 points 1 year ago (4 children)

The rapture has been coming any day now for two thousand years. It’s funny too because the Bible states itself that nobody knows when the second coming will happen and yet these idiots still try to predict it

Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.

[–] local_taxi_fix@lemmy.world 29 points 1 year ago (2 children)

After talking about end times and signs of end times the bible literally says

Truly I tell you, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. (Matthew 24:34).

Christians need to read their own book.

[–] 1024_Kibibytes@lemm.ee 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Some evangelical sects believe that one of the apostles was transported to heaven without dying, so they believe that that generation has technically not passed away.

[–] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Get around biblical contradictions with this one weird trick!

[–] ChunkMcHorkle@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

You jest, but it do be like that. Everything from grape juice for the no-alcohol crowd to virginal births for the no-sex crowd to thinking they can manipulate current events to rush fulfillment of the prophecies to force Jesus to come back sooner for the 21st century Christian Pharisee crowd, there is a way to make it work.

Shift it, twist it, ignore the parts they don't want, and they can easily make that book say whatever they need it to say . . . and then make it say the exact opposite tomorrow, because they're ~~flexible~~ linguistic contortionists that way.

[–] Nepenthe@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

What if all the apostles were buried alive

[–] Minarble@aussie.zone 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It’s already happened and nobody noticed.

A couple of hippies disappeared no one else was worthy.

[–] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Hey, at least there’s beer and weed here in hell-on-earth. It’s supposed to only be 7 years though, I guess the clock broke.

[–] pete_the_cat@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Every few years it's "the end of the world" 😂

[–] Immersive_Matthew@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I rarely chime in on these sorts of things, but maybe the bible was talking about AGI. ahahaha. We have no idea if it is really coming and at what hour. Might already be here. The Bible never said the Son of Man would be a human and AGI is our offspring.

[–] ChemicalPilgrim@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

AGI can't be worse at running things than a bunch of temperamental apes so let's go for it

Right. I have been saying this all over the place when I see humans doing awful things. I am not worried about AGI or ASI as much as I am worried about humans destroying the planet one way or another. Just ask the rest of the animal kingdom who they rather have in change.

[–] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Hey, I’m no ape! Don’t make me filling shit at you

[–] Chais@sh.itjust.works 49 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Of course they do. It's what they live for. All their focus is on the afterlife. Their actual life is just an annoyance that comes first.

[–] FlickOfTheBean@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago

Too bad their doctrine is to take everyone else with them, instead of being as courteous as the cults that self annihilate and leave the non-followers alone.

Seriously, their own book says man was charged with taking care of the world. By their own doctrine, God is the one that will end it, not man. But they're all either power hungry greed lords trying to take Gods destiny into their own hands or idiots who don't know what's in the book they thump so hard.

[–] NoneOfUrBusiness@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago

Nah man, if it was they'd be more well-behaved. Mortal life is where you discriminate against women and minorities.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 30 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Not new. US Evangelism is explicitly a doomsday cult, and Israel is key to their eschatology.

[–] thisisawayoflife@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

They are all kooky, dangerous people.

[–] frezik@midwest.social 29 points 1 year ago (2 children)

When it doesn't happen, I'm sure they'll all realize their folly and drop religion. This is definitely how it will go down.

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[–] Uranium3006@kbin.social 27 points 1 year ago

religion is actively dangerous to the entire world and shouldn't be tolerated or excused

[–] zaph@sh.itjust.works 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They did that in the 90's too. I remember the left behind series getting really popular because of it.

[–] taiyang@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I heard a podcast making fun of those stupid movies. Were they actually popular? I'm too young to know.

[–] comador@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I graduated in the early 90s and can say from my memory that while most people didn't pay attention to them, there was a massive amount of "End of the World" cults like Heavens Gate all the way to even mainstream Christianity saying the end was neigh. There was as much "eye rolling" then as there is today on the subject.

[–] Illuminostro@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

The Pentecostals in the Deep South forced millions of kids to watch that garbage.

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[–] ultranaut@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Yes, the books at least were hugely popular and basically inescapable if you were around Christians in the US during the 1990's.

[–] anomoly_@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I've always liked how Sam Harris addressed this:

It is, therefore, not an exaggeration to say that if the city of New York were suddenly replaced by a ball of fire, some significant percentage of the American population would see a silver-lining in the subsequent mushroom cloud, as it would suggest to them that the best thing that is ever going to happen was about to happen: the return of Christ. It should be blindingly obvious that beliefs of this sort will do little to help us create a durable future for ourselves - socially, economically, environmentally, or geopolitically. Imagine the consequences if any significant component of the US government actually believed that the world was about to end and that its ending would be glorious. The fact that nearly half of the American population apparently believes this, purely on the basis of religion dogma, should be considered a moral and intellectual emergency.

Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I was a student at an Evangelical college on 9/11/01. You know all those rumors about Muslims dancing in the streets that day? Yeah, that was actually happening at Evangelical schools and churches across the US. Those people thought Jesus was coming back that day. They were dancing (in the spirit of course, regular dancing is a sin) and weeping with joy. 🤮

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[–] GreenMario@lemm.ee 21 points 1 year ago

Christian love in action.

[–] rayyy@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

Evangelicals are living in their own hell on earth and want you to join them

[–] mo_lave@reddthat.com 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

21 “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. 22 On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ 23 And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’

Matthew 7

[–] AngryDemonoid@lemmy.lylapol.com 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

They don't want to actually read the bible. Just cherry-pick the useful parts.

[–] mightyfoolish@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

I know this would happen when "abortion is murder" backfired. They will do anything to seem like good people except for doing good deeds...

[–] Drusas@kbin.social 9 points 1 year ago

If only we could all be so lucky that it is the end of the world for evangelicals.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Let them go there and participate on their favourite side. I don't care which, as long as they are gone.

[–] mightyfoolish@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I don't understand why people get mad at Palestinians. Especially on a left site like Lemmy. Oh religion is bad. But Palestines aren't a religious ethnogroup. They came about naturally. But the Jews need a safe place to live. Well, Palestinians need a safe place from the "Israelis". Why does that part never matter?

[–] pandacoder@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If "Jesus" returned he would smite them all for the last 2000 years of bloodshed.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

They'd call him Jew-boy and say he wasn't a true Christian.

[–] GiddyGap@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago

This guy has made a lot of money for himself saying these things. Doesn't make sense to stop now.

[–] ofk12@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm well tempted to go over to America and pretend to be the second coming to brain wash all them nutters. Get them believing proper left wing ideals. I'd just do it for a laugh.

It would be easy.

[–] Texas_Hangover@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Do you want to be crucified? Cause that's how you get crucified.

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[–] Blackmist@feddit.uk 5 points 1 year ago

How long before we get another group of these nuts going all Waco on us again?

[–] NoneOfUrBusiness@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

AFAIK for their end of the world Israel needs to be destroyed or something? Not gonna happen with the limp dicks in power in the Arab world, that's for sure.

[–] Fisk400@feddit.nu 5 points 1 year ago

First Israel needs to properly form and when it's formed god will destroy it and kill all the Jews inside its borders. That will kick off the end of the world and all the evangelists will go directly heaven while the rest of the world suffers as the seas boil or something.

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[–] randon31415@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

If no time passes for the person from the time of death to the second coming when they (presumably) start to experience time again, then technically the second coming is one second after one's death. No one knows the time of their death (well mostly), so no one knows when the second coming will occur. Though, statistically, these old farts are tempoally closer to the second coming then the younger generations.

[–] zepheriths@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Naw bro, I have seen the text, it says 200 million soldiers. Gaza is barely 1% of that

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