this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2023
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xkcd

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Interpretations of the Hermeneutic Oath differ.

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[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 49 points 1 year ago

Hypocritic Oath: First, swear no oaths.

[–] randomaccount43543@lemmy.world 26 points 1 year ago

Hydrohomic Oath: First, drink 8 glasses of water

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

The Hippocratic oath kinda cracks me up, cuz we break it almost immediately at the start of most procedures by shoving a needle or scalpel into the skin.

I guess "do only necessary harm that will presumably heal in a way that results in a net positive" doesn't roll off the tongue quite as well.

Anyway, we fixed your appendicitis! damns you to a life of poverty with a bill that absolutely destroys your financial health

[–] DrRatso@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Its more “like first weigh the possible harm versus the potential benefit and do not pursue treatment avenues that are more likely to harm than do good”. If it were truly just “first do no harm”, medicine would not be practicable, because any intervention carries risks of some nature, don’t even get me started on oncology.

It is also worth noting that “first do no harm” is not even all that close to the wording of the actual oath, originally it is in fact more like what I typed out above.

[–] JackGreenEarth@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

The original hippocratic oath, by hippocrates, also forbids doing abortions on consenting women.

[–] randomaccount43543@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago
[–] RacoonVegetable@reddthat.com 10 points 1 year ago

Hydrodiving oath: first, avoid delta p.

[–] Nobody@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Hemophilic Oath, First do no bleeding.

[–] NeoNachtwaechter@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Iron_Lynx@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

But I can give you the apathetic oath:

First: who cares 😒

[–] roguetrick@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

Hippodromic oath should be first, wear your color. The hippodrome pretty much ran the politics of the empire.

So pardon me while I burst, and rise above the flames. Pardon me. Pardon me. Will I ever be the same?

[–] Hyggyldy@sffa.community 0 points 1 year ago

First, Journey.