this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2023
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Technology
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I thought you had to refer to a person by their old name for that to be the case, not just mention the existence of a former name. I could be wrong though.
Using the name is still deadnaming. Think of it like this. If you changed your name from Jim to John and saw a friend on the street, would you want them to say, "Hi John formerly Jim"? You'd likely just want them to call you by what your name is now. Add to that the likely dysphoria caused by some using a trans person's dead name, and it is now causing harm for no real reason. When in doubt, just call people what they want to be called.
But it is natural to bring it up if you're talking to a common friend that isn't aware of the change of name. OP was talking to us comment reader instead of that person.
If they hadn't done that, I would have had no idea who they were talking about. Sure don't use their old name when talking to them, but you have to use it sometimes when talking about them or people will have no clue who you are talking about.
But your example just referred to someone by their old name. Not saying you’re wrong, but that’s a terrible example. Haha
Better example would be: Friend says, “Hey John, how are you! Remember when you used to go by Jim? Boy, those were crazy times back then.”
Is that deadnaming?
EDIT: my bad. Just re-read the OP post and your example is dead on. For some reason I had it different in my head. Never mind!
Thing is, a lot of people just aren’t aware of Emily’s transition, because she’s been in very few LTT videos since she came out. It makes sense to quickly mention what people used to know her as.
If she had been in dozens of videos since coming out your point would make sense, but she just hasn’t.